Sex should be safe, respectful, and enjoyable. But unfortunately, many people encounter situations that make them feel uneasy, disrespected, or even unsafe. That’s why it’s important to recognize the red flags during sex that may seem small at first but can be major warning signs.

If you’re unsure about what behaviors qualify as red flags, this comprehensive guide by Planned Parenthood offers detailed insight into sexual consent, communication, and boundaries. It’s a verified and secure resource for understanding red flags during sex and how to handle them.

Here are 10 red flags during sex that you should never ignore:

. Lack of Consent or Communication

Consent is the foundation of any sexual experience. If someone initiates sex without asking, ignores your refusal or tries to pressure you into doing something you’re not comfortable with, that’s a serious red flag. Consent must be clear, ongoing, and mutual. Ignoring this is one of the most dangerous red flags during sex.

. They Ignore Your Boundaries

You said no, but they keep pushing. Maybe they try to remove the condom without telling you. Or they keep bringing up a sexual act you’ve already turned down. Or they make you feel guilty for not wanting to do some sexual acts that’s a clear sign of selfishness and disregard for your well-being.

Saying “no” should be respected without hesitation. If someone pushes, pressures, or dismisses your boundaries, it’s not just a red flag—it’s a dealbreaker. One of the most consistent red flags during sex is when your autonomy is violated.

. They Don’t Care About Your Pleasure

Sex is supposed to be enjoyable for both of you. If your partner only focuses on their own pleasure, rushes through foreplay, or doesn’t care whether you’re satisfied, it shows selfishness and that’s a red flag.

Sex should never be one-sided. If your partner doesn’t ask what you like or completely ignores your satisfaction, that’s one of the clearer red flags during sex that shows selfishness or disinterest in your well-being.

. They Refuse to Use Protection

If they don’t want to use condoms or try to convince you that “they won’t feel anything with a condom”, take that as a big red flag. Anyone who disregards protection is putting you at risk for STIs and unplanned pregnancy. Safe sex is non-negotiable.

Insisting on unsafe sex or refusing condoms shows a lack of care for your health. This isn’t just careless—it’s reckless. Always prioritize your safety and call this out as one of the most serious red flags during sex.

. They Shame You for Your Body or Experience

If they make negative comments about your body, compare you to their ex, or judge your sexual history, that’s your sign to leave.

Comments about your body shape, size, scars, or sexual history are not just rude—they’re abusive. If someone makes you feel ashamed in any way, recognize it as one of the emotional red flags during sex that can leave lasting damage.

. Their Hygiene is… Questionable

Bad breath. Body odor. Dirty nails. Poor hygiene is a major turn-off, and it also increases the risk of infections so run!

No one is perfect, but bad hygiene can put your health at risk. If they don’t prioritize being clean before getting intimate, it’s a clear indicator of disrespect and one of the overlooked red flags during sex.

. They Get Angry If You Don’t Orgasm

If they make you feel guilty or frustrated because you didn’t cum, it shows immaturity and a lack of understanding. Not every sexual experience will end in an orgasm, and that’s completely normal.

Orgasms aren’t guaranteed, and no one should make you feel guilty for not climaxing. Getting upset or blaming you is immature and toxic—and another example of the emotional red flags during sex that signal immaturity or entitlement.

. They Make You Feel Uncomfortable

Sex should never feel forced, awkward, or pressured. If something about the experience doesn’t feel right, listen to your gut. Feeling uncomfortable or uneasy during sex is a clear sign that something is off.

. Overly Aggressive Behavior or Forcefulness

Sex should never be forceful or aggressive, unless it’s part of a BDSM activity with clear boundaries. If your partner is overly aggressive or they don’t listen to you when you ask them to stop, it’s a major red flag.

If someone acts rough without checking in or goes beyond what you agreed to, don’t excuse it. It’s not dominance—it’s one of the biggest red flags during sex and shouldn’t be ignored.

. No Aftercare or Emotional Support

If they just get up and leave or act distant after sex, it might be a sign they don’t care about you beyond sex and that’s a red flag you shouldn’t ignore.

Intimacy is vulnerable, and a caring partner should offer comfort, even if it’s just a cuddle or kind word. If they leave you feeling cold or abandoned, it’s a strong emotional red flag—and sadly, one of the most common red flags during sex.

Understanding these red flags during sex empowers you to make safer, healthier choices. Always listen to your instincts, set firm boundaries, and prioritize emotional and physical safety. You deserve intimacy that is respectful, consensual, and fulfilling. Remember, you are in charge of your body, and the right partner will always respect that!