Sex is a fundamental part of human life, yet it’s often surrounded by myths, misinformation, and stigma. Whether you’re experienced or just beginning your journey, understanding the realities of sex is essential for your health, pleasure, and relationships.

Here are twelve important things every adult should know about sex:

1. Communication is Key:

Good sex starts with open communication. Talk to your partner about your desires, boundaries, and expectations. Being clear about what you like and don’t like helps build trust and ensures that both of you are on the same page.

2. Consent is Non-Negotiable:

Consent is the foundation of any healthy sexual relationship. It must be enthusiastic, mutual, and ongoing. If a person isn’t comfortable, unsure, or says no at any point, stop immediately. Always respect boundaries, as consent is key to emotional and physical safety. 

3. You Can Always Say No:

Even if you’ve said yes before, you have the right to change your mind at any time. Feeling pressured or obligated to have sex is a red flag in any relationship. Your comfort should always come first, and a respectful partner will understand and accept your decision without question.

4. Get tested:

Getting tested for sexually transmitted infections (STIs) is a crucial part of maintaining sexual health. Regular testing ensures you’re aware of your status, protects your partner(s), and helps you make informed decisions about your sexual activities. Once a year is great. 

5. Casual sex isn’t for everyone:

Casual sex, friends with benefits, fuck buddies, or a one night stand is not for everyone. Some people need a deep emotional connection to enjoy sex and that’s okay. Don’t have sex with someone hoping it would convince them to want a relationship or something more.

6. Longer sex does not mean better sex:

While you probably don’t want your partner lasting less than 2 minutes, long marathon sex isn’t always required for good sex. Quickies can be fun. Studies have found that the average desirable duration for sex is 7-13 minutes.

7. Sex doesn’t always feel amazing:

Every time you have sex will not be mind blowing or end in an orgasm. Sometimes sex is dull and sometimes it’s incredible. And that’s okay!

8. The more sex you have, the more sex you want:

Sex begets sex. Recent sex flashbacks make you want to reenact the fun. But the reverse is also often true – if you go too long without sex, you may forget how much you like it.

9. Sex gets better with age:

Sex does get better with age because with age comes experience and understanding of self. If you think you’re having the best sex of your life in your 20s, wait till you get to your late 30s and 40s. The future is looking bright!

10. The vagina doesn’t get loose with more partners:

It doesn’t make any difference if a woman sleeps with 30 different people or if she has sex 30 times with the same person. “Too much sex” doesn’t make the vagina loose. Childbirth, weak pelvic floor muscles and aging are what makes the vagina loose not frequent sex or many partners.

11. Penis size shaming is body shaming:

Penis size shaming has been far too normalized but it’s unfair to make fun of something that men have no control over. Unlike what is shown in porn, most men don’t have large swinging penises. The actual average length of an erection is between 5.1 and 5.5 inches and that’s a perfect size for female pleasure.

12. Everyone else is not having more (or better) sex than you:

There’s no “normal” amount of sex you should be having per week or per month. There’s only one question you need to answer – are you having enough sex for you?

By keeping these 12 tips in mind, you can navigate your sexual experiences with confidence, respect, and joy. Remember, the most important thing is to always prioritize your safety, comfort, and emotional well-being.